One of the unfortunate realities of severe workplace bullying is that targets often must leave their jobs in order to avoid further torment. For those who are debating that course of action, here are some considerations:
1. What are your other options for employment? (Remember, it’s easier to get a new job while you still have your old one.) Are there people besides the bully who can serve as a useful reference? Is this particular episode a sign that you should change vocations or professions? If so, what can you do to make a transition? A good career counselor for adults can help sort through the possibilities.
2. What are your employee benefit options? They may include using up vacation and personal days, accessing Family and Medical Leave Act benefits, filing a workers’ compensation claim, applying for unemployment benefits, and — in severe cases — applying for disability benefits.
This area is tricky business. For example, “voluntary” resignations usually preclude one from claiming unemployment benefits, and it is questionable whether leaving due to bullying qualifies as an exception. Talking to a lawyer who works with employee benefits may be useful before making any decision to leave a job.
3. Do you have any viable legal claims? As I’ve written many times on this blog, current legal protections are less than ideal, but possibly your situation might give rise to a lawsuit. A good employment lawyer can help you sort through those options.
4. How is your state of mind and your health in general? Counseling and medical care may be useful, even necessary, in severe situations. Be honest with yourself and do not feel self-conscious about seeking help.
5. Do you have a cushion of savings to sustain you during a period of unemployment? In some cases, a discussion with an investment advisor may be useful.
I’ve raised a lot of questions and provided no answers, in large part because the answers will be unique to the individual. But hopefully I have set out some important food for thought for those who are facing difficult decisions due to bullying or similar forms of mistreatment at work.
Thank you, Dr. Yamada, for pointing out some reality checks. Although these are hard times for many people, being bullied on the job is still unacceptable. It’s difficult to say how much is too much for, as you say, it’s an individual experience.
You make an excellent point about seeking help. Many of us are told to “be strong”, “just keep your mouth shut”, or “just hang in there, this will pass”. But asking for help from objective sources seems to make the most sense. Giving ourselves permission to admit that we are powerless over our work environment and asking for help is the BEST direction to go.
This is the second employer (education) in the past 10 years where I am confronted with workplace bullying. Knowing what is happening to me this time is making a real difference, but understanding workplace bullying has not prevented it from happening to me again.
I am seeing my doctor today about how the work environment may be affecting my blood pressure, my heart rate, and general overall health. I met with a counselor and am to meet again next week. I believe that, with their help, I can make a sound decision about whether to stay, take a leave of absence, or simply move on. It takes courage, no matter what the decision.
I appreciate your guidance and thank you for all you are contributing to raise awareness of the damage done to so many of us by workplace bullying.
Michelle, I appreciate your comment, especially coming from someone who knows what this is all about. Best wishes, David
It seems as if leaving another job is not the option.. In this economic crisis where so many people are jobless, I think it is time for you to face and expose the bully and seek counsel from a good employment attorney. I am sure the bully has a paper trail of priors.
Best,
Bee
Very informative article. I believe my wife is a victim of bullying at her job. She will be quitting soon because of this. And it’s A bad time for her to do that. I recently relocated to Virginia since my company uprooted from Texas. I had to relocate because I could not find another job in Texas. Anyway, my wife got layed off from her last job due to the same situation. But they did not offer any of the employees relocation packages. So she found another job in the Accounting field as a supervisor. But it didn’t take long before things went down hill. Firstly the person that was supposed to train her only trained her for two days, and told her that she was on her own. And then she was not given addiquate time to figure out how things worked around there. So when she tried to figure out things herself, of course things did not come out like they wanted, and that was the begining of what seems to me like harrassment. At first I thought she just needed to tuffen up and deal with it. But when they told her that she needed to pick her new hire and then choose a person of their liking instead of the person who she thought might help her out in the long wrong, things started looking a little more suspicious (They choose an employee who has been working there in another dept. for years. Someone that they knew, and was not qualified.) Then allowed that employee to go to school first thing in the morning during working hours. Company policy says if you attend school, then you should do it on your own time, with company reinburstment. So when that employee, after taking an hour and a half each day to go to school also wanted another hour for lunch breaks, my wife told her no, because she needed her there to help out. After that she has been scrutinized and told her work is bad, and also has been assigned projects which constantly being interupted with new work. These are projects that last all day. And I believe the managers know this. So, to make a long story short, the last straw was when her manager asked my wife for a file to be put on the network that was already put out ther by my wife, she told her no. This resulted in a write up that my wife did not want to sign because of the bogus charges in the write up. Anyway, there is much more involved then what I am able to type here. Don’t want to write everything, it would be too long. I don’t know what to do because now, my money will have to cover the house and apt rent since she will be out of a job. And I hate to tell her to go back because she complains about pains in her heart. Just don’t know what to do.
Thanks for listening: Reggie
P.S.
We do have an emergency fund for such occations. But I did not want to use it because of some unfair treatment of my wife.
Like I mentioned above.. NOW IS THE TIME FOR AN EMPLOYMENT ATTORNEY.. Jobs are scarce.
Reggie, I’m sorry to hear what you folks are going through. No magic answers on my end, unfortunately, other than to think things out carefully and not make rash decisions. Gary and Ruth Namie’s The Bully at Work (2009 edition) is loaded with helpful insight — it’s the book I suggest to individuals (and their families) who are going through bullying situations.
I stood up for a co-worker in her grievance against our boss who was a bully to everyone in the office. Out of 6 people, 3 coworkers said to my coworker keep your mouth shut and deal with it. The other three said to my coworker to report the abuse. I followed up with my own grievance against the boss. HR never reported the finding to me about my grievance again the boss. HR wanted my coworker to continue working for the bully boss but when my coworker filled a police report for the boss assaulting her and went to our security department the boss “resigned.” I was told, as were all my coworkers, if we ever talked about this to anyone, coworkers, family, or friends it would be grounds for dismissal.
Seek for help!!
I am a short asian woman. I was bullied by my workmate during the work, she is much bigger size than me, and she grabbed my neck and throat, told me: what do you want?. Now 3 days have passed, I have heard anything from my work about the invesgation. Where can I get help from? Please.
Jackie, I am very sorry to hear about your situation. I’ve gathered some sources of advice and assistance:
http://newworkplace.wordpress.com/need-help/
I hope some of that information is helpful to you. Good luck toward resolving this.
David
I am one of the lucky ones. I was able to find a job very similar to the one where I was bullied but I had to sell my house and relocate my family out of state. I left Utah and moved to Oregon where I now have similar pay, better benefits, nicer home and most of all a very nice boss. These are tough times but I think it is important to start a job search if the bullying gets too bad. Just make sure it’s what you want and know that you can get out and your situation can be better.